416 Subjective Symptom
Linda picked her words carefully as she spoke.
"What should we do from now on? We have resolved ourselves to stay away from the federation for a while. However, in the event our stay gets extended over a prolonged period of time, won't we become a burden to the person sheltering us? We were thinking of working in any way we can to lessen that burden."
I was impressed by this. I thought she was nothing more than a sheltered young lady but she's actually pretty good-natured.
And she's right, if the one sheltering them is a 'common man', her worries are warranted.
However by this point, I've made the decision to leave them in Eltros's hands.
As such, these ladies don't have to worry about working or anything. That organization isn't helpless enough to need them.
Hence I reassure her.
"Don't you worry a thing about that. The person I'm entrusting you ladies to is a wealthy man. And he won't dare to defy me. Although I'm not saying you'll get a special treatment, mind. Just that you don't need to overthink that stuff and take it slowly to come up with what you wanna do. No telling what's happening at the federation you know? With no way to predict the end result, you can't know what options available in the future."
I'm probably gonna get dragged into that mess, and the key to solving it would lie in my actions.
That's like setting up a flag myself but I am absolutely helping myself to a good hit on the root of all this mess, that Kanedor guy.
This whole mess isn't ending until after he's been taken care of.
So I'm not gonna pull back. And since I'm definitely going to the federation, I just know that not only am I gonna get involved, it'll be a full steam ahead into the vortex.
"...What do you mean by that? What are you planning to do?"
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Linda glared at me with an awfully pensive look. But I have no answer for her.
Or to be more exact, not even I know how the dice is going to roll.
"My plan is nothing big. Also, I promise you that I'll deliver all your letters. That's a done deal. But I have no clue what's going to happen before and after I do the things I wanna do. As it stands, apparently I possess the 'Factor of Unrest' in me."
I've finally made a progress on just what is lying inside me.
That word unconsciously slipped out of my mouth yet it just sounded right.
At the same time, I am now aware just how long and arduous my battle will be against this 'Factor of Unrest', with no end in sight.
I'm absolutely never going to live a peaceful life thanks to this. The 15 years I spent in my village were pretty much a miracle.
I could have lived my life without constant waves of problems if it was a place shut off from civilization with no human movement like my village.
But once you go out there, you live in a society.
This 'Factor of Unrest' will then be hard at work to generate events around the clock.
The only way to avoid that is to completely sever any and all ties with other people.
But if there's one thing I've learned so far, it's that once I've come in contact with anyone, severing that tie is utterly unfeasible.
I don't believe I'm capable of stopping the chain reaction. And unfortunately it's not in my nature to just abandon all the bonds brought about by that chain.
I only now noticed my life's plan is but a pipe dream within a dream, virtually an illusion.
My face must be getting really pale after realizing all that from the word leaving my mouth.
So much so that Linda who had been anxious about her future is now worried about me instead.
"Are you all right? Did something bad happen? Um...?"
"It's nothing. It's a personal issue. Don't worry about it. Sorry. Things should calm down once we've arrived at the commercial town. You should take it easy in your room today and prepare for tomorrow."
Thus I rather forcefully urged Linda to go back to her room before lying down on my bed.
"Aaaaah. The more I think about it, the more I realize this stuff is beyond saving..."
And so I spent the rest of the day feeling melancholic until I parted ways with my consciousness in sleep.
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